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  #51 (permalink)  
Old 03-08-2006, 11:45 AM
morgan20 morgan20 is offline
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lining birdcages since '95.
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It looks fine on my screen.
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  #52 (permalink)  
Old 03-08-2006, 07:54 PM
Mikie Mikie is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Over there
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well I've seemed to have came up with something that irritates when someone making decisions shouldn't be...works best when it's the owner or one of his relatives


"sure, I get paid by the hour, why not"
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  #53 (permalink)  
Old 03-09-2006, 04:13 AM
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LoganBlade LoganBlade is offline
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Location: Boston, MA
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I ussually will accept I get payed by the hour when I have to tell my pressman he has to wait because I need to make new plates. Anyone else can do something different
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  #54 (permalink)  
Old 03-09-2006, 11:36 AM
JoePixel JoePixel is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Fountain Valley, California
Posts: 380
Some of our favorites:

When dealing with a tight schedule - You crammed 10 pounds of shit into a 5 pound bag.

A favorite saying for when we get crappy files is - It's good enough for what we were given.

MILP - Make It Look Pretty.

Add a PITA Tax (Pain in the ass)

After you spend alot of time fixing a piece of crap artwork file, I say it's like putting whip cream on top of a turd.

Pressman are called "Knuckle Draggers" (Ape like)

My favorite saying is "Sure it can be done, but how much money are you willing to spend?"

The one that I say the most but hate to say is "Can you give me more information on this job please"
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  #55 (permalink)  
Old 03-09-2006, 12:07 PM
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Earendil Earendil is offline
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Location: I'm with stupid
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One of my favorites is 'speed quality and price, pick any 2'
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Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather restraints

Volkl - Karma... All Mountain Shredders
Line - Mothership... Super Phat Powder Surfers
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  #56 (permalink)  
Old 03-09-2006, 07:05 PM
macVato macVato is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 73
OE

operator error.
-
theres a commercial out with the easy button, i cut it of a ad and glued it to the back of my chair. the pressmen like to kick it, while the salesman swears they actually have one, and he is goona buy me one. sweet.
-
and when the owner comes running in my department i turn away and say NO. sometime he stands there for 30 seconds deciding what to do.
-
i tell the salesmen that i am goona put up a sign that says:

salesman hours 3:00 - 3:15
-
somehow i still like my job.
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  #57 (permalink)  
Old 03-10-2006, 04:13 AM
zillah zillah is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 65
We used to keep a binder where I use to work for the inexperienced with samples of jobs, plate and proofing problems known as the W.I.T.H.I.T. (What In The Hell Is That)
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  #58 (permalink)  
Old 03-10-2006, 12:58 PM
 
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Sometimes just saying anything in reply like Beavis and Butthead drives people here crazy. Example, "We need it on press in an hour!" reply "Ummm, huh, huh, huh, ummm. Is this like hot or something?"

Pretty much any response more moronic than their question should do the trick.
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  #59 (permalink)  
Old 03-15-2006, 06:02 AM
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cpi cpi is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: "On the Edge" in Maryland
Posts: 164
New one I used this morning for a quote request with NO specs...

Dear xxxx,

How many toppings (ie. copies) would you like on that pizza.... and what kind of crust (ie. stock)?





I love it... "I want something.... don't know what... but I want something... and I'm not sure how many..... any idea how much it'll be?" :roll:
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MAC: G5 OSX 10.3.9; PC: DELL Dim. 2400 Pent. 4 Win.XP; PC: HP Pavilion Pent. III Win.98.
Output: DocuColor 240; HP LaserJet 4000; Phaser 7750; PressMate-FS Filmsetter-ColorMark RIP.
Software: InDesign, PageMaker, Corel Draw, Photoshop, Illustrator.

***WAIT*** I don't do any of this crap anymore! I've put my Nursing cap back on - There *is* life beyond PrePress!
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  #60 (permalink)  
Old 03-16-2006, 12:43 AM
zoondoggie zoondoggie is offline
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Location: Napa
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My main standby is "You can wish in one hand and shit in the other, and see which one fills up first"

Cheers
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