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  #81 (permalink)  
Old 09-01-2006, 04:41 AM
Kristian Kristian is offline
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Location: United Kingdom
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a good one today from our sales department.

"Can you use this?" she says, waving a colour laserproof at me, that she had printed from a PDF on email.

It took a while, but then I realised that she actually was asking me to work from the laser proof??!!


Yes, our press department can accept all formats ArtPro, Illustrator, InDesign and HP LaserPrinter Paper. :roll:


Loving this post, good to read back through when you need cheering up.
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  #82 (permalink)  
Old 09-01-2006, 06:40 AM
UncleTwitchy UncleTwitchy is offline
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Location: West Central Illinois
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Quote:
Originally Posted by negative_perfection
"Well, I don't know if it's color - the top part is red, the circle is blue, and the words are in black - is that considered color?"
Sounds to me like they were just being sarcastic and you didn't pick up on it.
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  #83 (permalink)  
Old 09-01-2006, 09:37 AM
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pspdfppd pspdfppd is offline
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Scenario: Apogee X plus 2 macs on the system acting crazy. Can't get any output without rebooting, calling tech support etc. etc. Jobs backing up everyone getting p.o'ed at me. (we've all been there i think).

In walks a pressman. Says: I know what your problem is...I had it at home. Just defrag the hard drive. It worked for me.


.......
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  #84 (permalink)  
Old 09-01-2006, 09:52 AM
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David David is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stupid idiot co-worker
Just defrag the hard drive........


great tip!!!


Thanks a TON!!!

8O


....Now, go back to your hole, dink...



rotflmao!!!


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  #85 (permalink)  
Old 09-08-2006, 09:40 AM
pre-press-john pre-press-john is offline
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Location: Nottingham UK
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"You can single cut the outers but the inners have bleed on so we will have to double cut them"

One of our less experianced members of the department!!! 8O
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Cheers

John
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  #86 (permalink)  
Old 09-13-2006, 11:36 PM
Farabomb Farabomb is offline
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Posts: 54
I just had my brother, the bastard that got me into printing whom I have yet to forgive, measure a job with a ruler.... on my screen!

Then he asked me why it wasn't the right size. I would have killed him but he signs my check.

That may explain why whenever he does a imposition the math is off.
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  #87 (permalink)  
Old 12-05-2006, 11:42 AM
ridingnowhere ridingnowhere is offline
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not quite ruler on a screen bad, but here's one:

(while i'm masking in photoshop) "what's all that red doing there?" --my boss

gotta love it...
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  #88 (permalink)  
Old 12-05-2006, 07:52 PM
Luxtable Luxtable is offline
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Location: Buffalo, NY
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My team leader gives me a job that is closed and I tell him i cant log in under that job number anymore. He asks me if i can "force it"


"Can u bang this out?"
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  #89 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2006, 01:38 AM
Farabomb Farabomb is offline
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I love the "bang this out" quote. As if I just sit there and hit the print button.

I've been getting my hours thrown around all week for a "rush" job that was going to come in late monday. Tuesday night it was going to clear so I'd get to play prepress tennis for 4 hours to get a working file. Now wednesday it's going to clear at noon. Bet my paycheck it won't be there when I come in at 2pm and I'll get another 16hr day of fighting with the customer to get a good file.

I love financial printing. Wait, wait, wait, then flip some shit file in hours. They wonder why some days I come in not feeling myself. I get to play the overnight role. My "hours" are 2pm-10pm untill a late job comes in and it gets pushed to whenever to whenever. Small shop = owners get to sleep, workers loose their normal life for the all mighty dollar. I need to find a sugar mama.

P.S. I'm the IT department too. I didn't see the welcome to hell sign but I'm sure I missed it in the confusion.
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  #90 (permalink)  
Old 12-06-2006, 08:20 AM
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hotmetal hotmetal is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Farabomb
I love financial printing. Wait, wait, wait, then flip some shit file in hours. They wonder why some days I come in not feeling myself. I get to play the overnight role. My "hours" are 2pm-10pm untill a late job comes in and it gets pushed to whenever to whenever.
I knew I'd hate financial printing. I declined one typesetting offer in New York around 1982 where everyone, 2nd shift included, had to wear a tie and jacket to work. It paid better than any job I'd had yet, but I wasn't keen on riding the subway home at 3AM wearing a mug-me suit. Especially after hitting CBGB after work for a few beers (I kew one of the barmaids and never paid a cover once she introduced me to the bouncers. Really liked that place, it was my neighborhood bar. That, and the Shillelagh, on the corner of 30th Ave and 48 St in Queens. Miss living that life... but I'll probably live longer now that I just go straight home at night... )

I've been wooed by several financial printers over the years (they seemed to like my unix jock background)... and turned them down.

Anyway, so one day around 1994 I finally asked the day guy why I always found the mouse on the mac we shared set to "slow" when I came in. This was before multiple logins, and I was tired of switching it back every day at 3PM (and was betting he was getting tired of the same thing at 7AM) so I asked him (since I couldn't figure for the life of me why you'd want to spend your day being so pokey slow on an already annoying Quadra 950) and he said:

"I'm paid by the hour."

He was also the guy that hated quark so bad he'd save every quark file he was handed down to a quark eps, then open that mess up in illustrator so he could "work" it in the application he knew "better." His illy files were wonders of crap to behold, multiplied by the inherent type reflow madness of what illustrator does to type from crappy epses out of quark.

A few years later they made him the boss. I quit the next day.
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would you be wanting some kerning with that?
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